Family

Family / Life / Relationships — No Comments
15
Sep 08

Everyone’s at home tonight

It’s a rare night when everyone is at home together at our house.  Between friends, football practice and jobs, we can barely pull together a family night these days.  So, I’m happy that we are all here tonight, safe and sound.  We’re each doing our own thing right now–Josh is in the shower, Alex is watching football and browsing on Myspace in the upstairs den, John’s watching a show on Botswana downstairs and I’m hanging out at the computer in the study upstairs.  All is right in the universe.  (Well, except for John being crabby which is highly unusual unless he’s starving, which he’s not right now.) 

I had no idea how much I would love being part of a family when I met John and we got serious about turning our relationship into a life-long commitment.  I had an idea I’d enjoy it (I got a good preview during our dating days) but I never could have dreamed just how much.  Sure, there are the typical frustrations like Josh leaving his stuff everywhere, Alex’s music that’s more screaming than music, nobody getting how to put dishes in the dishwasher and the general chaos that comes with having a house full of people and animals.  But on the other hand, there’s all the fun that comes with having teens around–they really are a crack up.  When we do manage to sit down to dinner together, the stories we get from the kids just kill me.  We end up busting up half the time.  I told John I think I laugh more with the kids than I do with our own friends and that’s nothing to sneeze at.  That constitutes a good time for me! 

I feel very lucky tht I am able to be a part of Alex and Josh’s lives.  It’s truly a privilege and I don’t take it for granted–I try not to, anyway.  I know they won’t be living here forever so it’s important to treasure these nights when everyone’s at home together. 

(Okay, the photo is of all of us at the airport in Paris in December 2007, during our 12 hour layover on the way to South Africa.  Yes, that’s Alex sitting in the luggage cart!)

Family / Relationships — No Comments
1
Sep 08

Chosen Family

I moved to California when I was 24.  I was a newlywed (the first time around…) with all of my family still back on the East coast except for a cousin in Los Angeles who I didn’t know very well.  Sixteen years later, I’ve created my own California family.  I have friends I’ve spent Thanksgivings and Christmases with, friends who’ve been there for my 30th and 40th birthdays, who’ve seen me through my divorce, my new marriage, lost relationships, graduate school, new jobs, you name it.  I love the concept of “chosen family.”  That’s what my very closest friends are.  I can be completely myself when I’m with them and I know they will always be there for me and my new family, no matter what.  Tonight John and I had dinner with Laura, Terry, Max and Jake–part of our chosen family.  They called us at 2 pm to see if we had dinner plans. We didn’t so we ended up at their house for a spontaneous dinner.  We chopped and cooked together, caught up on life and cleaned up the kitchen together when all was done.  Just like family.  Laura and Terry have been in my life since 2000 when Laura and I met at work.  We’ve all been through a lot together over the past eight years–lots of ups and downs–and they embraced John when he came into my life a few years ago.  In fact, Terry married us!  We wanted someone to marry us who we both loved and respected and who was spiritually grounded and Terry fit the bill to a tee.  It’s one of the best decisions we’ve ever made.  Terry did a beautiful job officiating our wedding ceremony (this picture is of Terry and Laura at our wedding)–his words were so personal and warm and completely fitting for the two of us.  I love my family–and now John’s family–but even though they are all over the country and the world, we have our chosen family right here at home.  And that suits us just fine.